needing a psych doctor because i can’t afford a psych doctor

by depressed nomad

We all want what we can’t have. I know this to be true because I continue to pine after entitled pricks who eventually dump me. I never thought I could feel the same way about something like decent health insurance, but I want it so much more because it seems to be perpetually out of my grasp.

I am currently a contract worker making enough money to live comfortably but not quite enough to afford coverage beyond baseline preventative care. As such, I have to accept my staffing firm’s less-than-stellar health insurance. I had an appointment the other day at my usual psych doctor (my previous health insurance was not great either, so this doctor’s office is more or less a rat’s den). Upon arriving at the “doctor’s office,” I was called to the front desk to give them my new insurance card. And apparently, my new health provider doesn’t provide mental health coverage…

So, after an hour of waiting, I was escorted to a doctor. I say “a” doctor because I soon discovered the man I was taken to was not my usual doctor. I don’t know what’s worse, my last appointment, which was booked on a day that the office was closed…or seeing someone completely new after an hour of waiting and having to walk them through my life in New York (an ever-growing puss bubble of dread, anxiety, and sweatbox subway rides).

The doctor reviewed my current meds and proceeded to mansplain the addictive nature of Xanax. (Wait….what??? Xanax is addictive? This was almost as helpful as being told blow was addictive.) At this point, the doctor asked how I was feeling. I confirmed I was not great since setting foot in this fluorescent basement and a lot of my current anxiety had to do with him. Bless a male doctor’s tendency to dose out drugs without really caring about a patient’s long-term well-being.

I define healthcare as a system that provides care to all who seek it, whatever their economic status might be. I recently moved back from London, where the NHS provides universal (humane) healthcare. While it has its issues, most people generally receive similar health treatment, regardless of employment, income, whatever. Healthcare is not the nonsense we are handed in the US, which gets much better as your income increases. They also have a universal price on drugs under the NHS, 8 pounds.

I have more privileges than a lot of people in this country, and I still can’t count on there being hand soap in some of the healthcare centers I go to. Not ok. I would say pass me an Ambien and wake me when this inequality is fixed, but I know my vote is too important for that. #2020. Also probably can’t afford that brand name…

A note after the fact:

Since writing this entry, I have moved to Texas…No hefty appetite for government subsidies here. Birth control is still free, right??? Thank god I got a year’s supply of birth control from the UK before moving here.

My company does not provide health insurance until 90 days of employment. So now I’m with no health insurance again. And as before, I am still on a cocktail of meds.

I just got back from Walgreens, and a single medication was over $300. Luckily the pharmacist gave me a coupon (GoodRx people!!), so it was just under $200 for 30 pills.

But yeah, UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE #2020

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